The Dog Rules

You may have already stumbled across this clever and completely accurate list of rules for sharing a home with dogs, but as often as I see it mentioned I never see it attributed to the source. A quick search turned up The Dog Rules: (Damn Near Everything) by  William J. Thomas. I’ve not read this, but Thomas sure seems to have life with dogs figured out, and the reviews are promising. I thought it worth a mention with the holidays coming: I never have enough gift ideas for Christmas.

1. The dog is not allowed in the house!
2. Okay, the dog is allowed in the house, but only in certain rooms.
3. The dog is allowed in all rooms, but has to stay off the furniture.
4. The dog can get on the OLD furniture only.
5. Fine, the dog is allowed on all the furniture, but is not allowed to
sleep with the humans on the bed.
6. All right, the dog is allowed on the bed, but ONLY by invitation.
7. The dog can sleep on the bed whenever he wants, but NOT under
the covers.
8. The dog can sleep under the covers by invitation ONLY.
9. The dog can sleep under the covers every night.
10. Humans must ask permission to sleep under the covers with the dog.
Life With Dogs post end paw print


  1. Yeah, heard this one before and love it every time! This is our story! LOL

  2. Classic. :)

  3. It cracks me up every time I read it!

  4. bonny says on  10/18/2010 at 11:20 am

    yep especialy true if u have whippets or ilalian well as if i want it it’s myn and several other rules with that in mind.

  5. Billi says on  10/18/2010 at 1:48 pm

    Wouldn’t want to have it any other way!

  6. jufi says on  10/18/2010 at 3:36 pm

    Yeah, I have a GSD who wasn’t allowed on the bed….notice the word “wasn’t” alas…she sleeps right between us ….a little crowded, but after all….

  7. I haven’t seen this before but I love it! #10 is especially true at my house! Dang, I have a queen sized bed and I can’t figure out how they do it but my chihuahuas somehow manage to take up the whole thing and there’s barely enough room left over for me.

    • Freds Mom says on  10/19/2010 at 12:33 pm

      you are lucky. I have a twin bed and 3 dogs one is 80 lbs, the other 2 about 25lbs. I have to squirm and wiggle to get in to the bed.

  8. yep sounds like my house..DOGS RULE!!!

  9. We pretty much skipped 1-8. There was no use trying, even if we’d wanted to.

  10. Love this! We actually shopped for casual living room furniture with the dogs in mind. We wanted to make sure there was enough room for us AND them on the sofa. :)

    • Nancy says on  10/18/2010 at 7:01 pm

      Did the same, now looking for someone to recover said new furniture! Was ready to give the adult kids heck for the wear n tear until we realized it was the dog! Awwww, sweet baby. lol

  11. I have this hanging on my wall, but the word “dog” has been replaced with “vizsla”

  12. Hilarious! Thanks for sharing!


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